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"Share your true feelings, while requesting a specific course of action from your partner," Monet advises. For example, "'This thing isn't working for me, would you be willing to change it?' 'I would be so turned on if you lost 20 pounds.' The big reward any man gets is female approval." Monet suggests talking frankly about your feelings with your partner. But "any time we threaten our partners by withholding sex or love whether we're male or female, we take the relationship in a negative direction." "It's great that women are realizing that we are also visual creatures and that we are sexually stimulated by what we see and that we have a right to ask our partners to gift us with the benefit of good grooming and a regular visit to the gym," Veronica Monet, a certified sexologist who specializes in relationship dynamics, says. But at that point it was too late." A year after that conversation, Sabine left the relationship. He said he would try to take better care of himself. When Sabine finally confronted Kurt, "he was shocked. ‘He was growing man boobs’Sabine* says Kurt* began piling on the pounds 18 months into their three-year relationship. The data reveals that more than 34 percent of Americans are obese, compared to 32.7 percent who are overweight nearly six percent of Americans are "extremely" obese. It's no secret that obesity is a national epidemic: The number of obese American adults outweighs the number of those who are merely overweight, according to data released in January 2009, by the National Center for Health Statistics. They buy him gift certificates to trainers and gym memberships as incentives," Triplett explains. "They usually give an ultimatum: 'We're going on a vacation and you have until June to look this good,' and they give him a picture that they want him to mold himself to. She has found that women in their 20s in particular stop having sex with their partners when they don't meet their idealized notion of what a man should look like. Laura Triplett, an assistant professor at California State University-Fullerton, conducts research on body image and the social implications of physical appearance.